Greg and I have had a hard time feeling the spirit lately while at church. There are so MANY people and after a year and a half I still only know half of their names. They are wonderful and nice, but I guess I feel like I still only know people on the surface level. I am not sure if that is the reason why we don't feel the spirit or not. I am sure some of it is us, some of it is other things and some of it is even more other things. I don't think there is one reason.
Well, yesterday before church, we knelt and said a prayer that today we would be able to feel the spirit. And I did, a little bit. Sister Johnson's talk was very touching. But I guess I still felt like I lacked. I sort of felt the spirit when I taught the primary children A Child's Prayer. I love that song and I can't help feel something when I sing it. That was the song I always sang when I was little and afraid. But some how it still left me wanting more....
When I got home from church, I was tired. I always am. Church wears me out. I messed around of the computer, talked to my sister, and made dinner. I thought of the musical "The Book of Mormon" and the song in it called "I believe" . It is supposed to be a joke to make fun of Mormons. How a Mormon "Just believes" even if it sounds crazy or is crazy. The song does some how ring true. That is what faith is. Believing without seeing. Believing even when it doesn't all add up in your head. "Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things, therefore if yea have faith yea hope for things which are not seen which are true"( Thank you very much family scripture time for helping me memorize that) However, my mind did think about how everything really does sound crazy to most educated people without faith. Not just Mormonism but all Christianity really. Or all organized religion. I sighed. I was deep in thought. I decided to just go to bed.
I was reading in bed waiting for Greg to come up so I could go over my feelings with him. I was waiting and reading and waiting.... And then I heard something. Did I leave the TV on? Was Greg playing music down stairs? ..... I listened..... A beautiful sweet voice was singing. Who was it? What was it singing?
"Gethsemane Jesus loves me. So he went willingly to Gethsemane
He felt all that was sad, wicked or bad
All the pain we would ever know
While His friends were asleep
He fought to keep
His promise made long ago
Gethsemane Jesus loves me. So He went willingly to Gethsemane"
It was Ali. But it was almost too good to be Ali. My heart was touched. It was soft, gentle, and innocent. I wasn't expecting my heart to suddenly burn. I felt the spirit. She sang for two minutes- All the way down the hall in her room while I was in mine. I thought about going to her. Thanking her. Telling her I needed that more than anything. But I didn't. I don't know why. Maybe I was too shocked by what I felt. I almost was afraid to move because maybe I might pop the bubble I felt.
Thank you for answering A Child's Prayer last night Heavenly Father. You really are there. That is Why I believe.
Monday, August 12, 2013
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Liam turns 2 ( back in April)
This little guy wears me out! He is go, go, go all of the time!
Who wants cake? ME!!!!!!
- Full of Energy
-Just started sharing ( and it is really sweet- likes to give sad people his blanket)
-Enoch and him do NOT get a long - and they share a room
- loves Lego Ninjago and pretends to be one lots of the day
- loves chicken nuggets, apples, and cuties
- still chuckles
-very stubborn through huge fits often ( he is the boy version of Ali)
- Has tons of weird "words" for things
Jas - All friends that he has ( our neighbor's name is Jas)
Truck - all automobiles
Duck - most animals
Bulk- milk ( which is what my mom tells me I called milk- weird)
Hunk shu- He is tired ( a fake snoring sound)
two- more than one ( he says around 100 times a day)
poop - he says around 300 times a day almost like the word "um"
uh huh - means "uh huh" but said in a very high pitched voice
hoo hoo - a TV show (Go Diego Go starts of singing hoo hoo)
Baby- his name
baby- anything small
daddy- anything big
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Forgot
I just looked at the calender at the bottom of the computer.
3:29 PM 3/26/2013.
Baby number 5 would have been born a few day ago.
I was due on March 29th, and I normally have my babies a week early because I need a c-section.
I can't believe I forgot.
I am glad I forgot. And I am also sad I forgot. And mad at myself I forgot. How could I? How could I have forgotten that? How could I have forgotten baby number 5? I hate myself for it. My life would have totally been different. Things would have been crazy right now. I might have even been home from the Hospital by now. It might have been another boy or .... a girl.....to many possibilities to even think of. Crazy.
I have been so happy this last month. I have felt so blessed. I have loved my day to day life ( for the most part). I feel like so many of my dreams have come true and now I am just living my dreams. I have been so happy that I forgot the sadness. Funny how the heart heals.
I need to read with Enoch yet. I got dinner to make and clean up. I am teaching astronomy to the cub scouts tonight and of course there is homework. Sigh. I cried while writing this, but somehow..... I am already feeling better.
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Skate Party with Cousins
Greg had several people over to play games this weekend including his brother and my two brothers. Some of their kids came along, so the cousins had fun playing all weekend.
A friend of mine had a coupon to a skating party on Saturday night that she couldn't use. She was so kind to let us use it. The cousins had so much fun!
However, it was A LOT harder than it looked! They all fell several times.
However they still had a good time.
Zoe had some of the best comments of the night. They went like this. "Everyone makes it look so easy. They are just skating around and around so smoothly." and "I love the music. I love the lights. It should be fun. But this is so hard!"
It was pretty late for all of them so I think the trying something hard and new was even harder.
I had a blast. I loved roller skating as a child. It brought back many memories. I hope we do it again soon.
Super Dress up
Sometimes life is wonderful. This is one of those moments.
So stinking cute these two!
Super Hero Brothers to the rescue!
My life is wonderful.
UPWARD
The past three months Ali and Shadrach have been playing Upward Basketball. I have loved the program. It is run through several different churches in the area. During their practice, they have a 15 min. devotional where they apply character traits like being Christlike, responsibility, and honesty to life situations and basketball situations.
Shadrach loved every min. of it. However, after three months he still never got the ball to even touch the rim. That didn't bother him at all though. He focused on what a good defender he was and enjoyed the success of his team.
Ali on the other hand seem to have a talent for it. This was her first time doing any kind of sport. She learned how to make baskets right away. She scored almost every game and some times scored as many as 8 points. So we will have to see what happens with her basketball skills.
We are glad both of them enjoy basketball. Even though we are not athletic, we see understanding sports as something essential in our culture. So we will contiue sports but probably not like most parents do. We are doing it more for the educational benifits of understand American culture than actually wanting our children to play in college or something like that.
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