Angry

I will never get used to Greg leaving. I CAN get used to being by myself. I can do it on my own. It is hard and I don't like it but I can take care of four kids by myself. but what I CANNOT do is say good bye to Greg over and over and over again. I feel like it kills a little part of me on the inside. I love it when he comes home but I hate it too because I know he is going to leave again. I hate the leaving.

the stress of moving has gotten to me. I find I am angry often. I am not really an angry person but I find myself angry most of the time. Not at Greg or at the kids but at other people who happen to be around me. I am sure that in reality they are not doing anything that would make a sane person mad. But I am not sane. I am crazy. My stress level is so high. I have not yelled at any one or even told them I am mad. I just think it. But as a man thinkth so is he. I am Really tired of being angry. I keep on doing what Jason Kirton and I would alway do when we were little. If we ever started feeling bad, we would always remind ourselves it could be so much worse. Then we would imagine all of these really terrible awful things that could go wrong. So much so it would often makes us laugh..... liked I could be pregnant right now, and my house could burn down tonight, and I could have 2 dogs, and I could go blind and some kind of car wreck and all of the ice cream machines in the world could break and there would never be ice-cream again! -sigh-
How can you be angry after that?