A Child's Prayer- Why I believe

Greg and I have had a hard time feeling the spirit lately while at church.  There are so MANY people and after a year and a half I still only know half of their names.  They are wonderful and nice, but I guess I feel like I still only know people on the surface level.  I am not sure if that is the reason why we don't feel the spirit or not.  I am sure some of it is us, some of it is other things and some of it is even more other things.  I don't think there is one reason. 

Well, yesterday before church, we knelt and said a prayer that today we would be able to feel the spirit.  And I did,  a little bit.  Sister Johnson's talk was very touching.  But I guess I still felt like I lacked.  I sort of felt the spirit when I taught the primary children A Child's Prayer.  I love that song and I can't help feel something when I sing it.  That was the song I always sang when I was little and afraid.  But some how it still left me wanting more.... 

When I got home from church, I was tired.  I always am.  Church wears me out.  I messed around of the computer, talked to my sister, and made dinner.  I thought of the musical "The Book of Mormon" and the song in it called "I believe" .   It is supposed to be a joke to make fun of Mormons.  How a Mormon "Just believes" even if it sounds crazy or is crazy.  The song does some how ring true.  That is what faith is.  Believing without seeing.  Believing even when it doesn't all add up in your head.   "Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things, therefore if yea have faith yea hope for things which are not seen which are true"( Thank you very much family scripture time for helping me memorize that)  However, my mind did think about how everything really does sound crazy to most educated people without faith.  Not just Mormonism but all Christianity really.  Or all organized religion.   I sighed.  I was deep in thought.  I decided to just go to bed.

I was reading in bed waiting for Greg to come up so I could go over my feelings with him.  I was waiting and reading and waiting.... And then I heard something.  Did I leave the TV on? Was Greg playing music down stairs?  ..... I listened.....  A beautiful sweet voice was singing.  Who was it?  What was it singing? 

"Gethsemane  Jesus loves me.  So he went willingly to Gethsemane

He felt all that was sad, wicked or bad
All the pain we would ever know
While His friends were asleep
He fought to keep
His promise made long ago

Gethsemane  Jesus loves me.  So He went willingly to Gethsemane"

It was Ali.  But it was almost too good to be Ali.  My heart was touched.  It was soft, gentle, and innocent.  I wasn't expecting my heart to suddenly burn.  I felt the spirit.  She sang for two minutes- All the way down the hall in her room while I was in mine.  I thought about going to her.  Thanking her.  Telling her I needed that more than anything.  But I didn't.  I don't know why.  Maybe I was too shocked by what I felt.  I almost was afraid to move because maybe I might pop the bubble I felt. 

Thank you for answering  A Child's Prayer last night Heavenly Father.  You really are there.  That is Why I believe.

Liam turns 2 ( back in April)

This little guy wears me out!   He is go, go, go all of the time!

Who wants cake? ME!!!!!!

Liam
- Full of Energy
-Just started sharing ( and it is really sweet- likes to give sad people his blanket)
-Enoch and him do NOT get a long - and they share a room
- loves Lego Ninjago and pretends to be one lots of the day
- loves chicken nuggets, apples, and cuties
- still chuckles
-very stubborn through huge fits often ( he is the boy version of Ali)

- Has tons of weird "words" for things
Jas - All friends that he has ( our neighbor's name is Jas)
Truck - all automobiles
Duck - most animals
Bulk- milk ( which is what my mom tells me I called milk- weird)
Hunk shu- He is tired ( a fake snoring sound)
two- more than one ( he says around 100 times a day)
poop - he says around 300 times a day  almost like the word "um"
uh huh - means "uh huh" but said in a very high pitched voice
hoo hoo - a TV show  (Go Diego Go starts of singing hoo hoo)
Baby- his name
baby- anything small
daddy- anything big

Easter 2013

Forgot

I just looked at the calender at the bottom of the computer. 

3:29 PM 3/26/2013. 

 

I look at it all of the time.  But this time for some reason the number jumped out at me.  I have been so busy collecting money for cub scout camp, helping Elizabeth move, reading with the kids, homework, laundry, cleaning, making meals etc...I forgot.  

 

Baby number 5 would have been born a few day ago. 

 

 I was due on March 29th, and I normally have my babies a week early because I need a c-section. 

 

I can't believe I forgot.

 

I am glad I forgot. And I am also sad I forgot. And mad at myself I forgot.  How could I?  How could I have forgotten that?  How could I have forgotten baby number 5?  I hate myself for it.  My life would have totally been different.  Things would have been crazy right now.  I might have even been home from the Hospital by now.  It might have been another boy or .... a girl.....to many possibilities to even think of.  Crazy. 

 

 I have been so happy this last month.  I have felt so blessed.  I have loved my day to day life ( for the most part).  I feel like so many of my dreams have come true and now I am just living my dreams.  I have been so happy that I forgot the sadness.  Funny how the heart heals. 

 

 I need to read with Enoch yet.  I got dinner to make and clean up.  I am teaching astronomy to the cub scouts tonight and of course there is homework.  Sigh.  I cried while writing this, but somehow..... I am already feeling better.

Skate Party with Cousins

Greg had several people over to play games this weekend including his brother and my two brothers.  Some of their kids came along, so the cousins had fun playing all weekend.

A friend of mine had a coupon to a skating party on Saturday night that she couldn't use.  She was so kind to let us use it.  The cousins had so much fun!

However, it was A LOT harder than it looked!  They all fell several times. 

However they still had a good time.

Zoe had some of the best comments of the night.  They went like this.  "Everyone makes it look so easy.  They are just skating around and around so smoothly."  and "I love the music.  I love the lights.  It should be fun. But this is so hard!"

It was pretty late for all of them so I think the trying something hard and new was even harder.

I had a blast.  I loved roller skating as a child.  It brought back many memories.  I hope we do it again soon.

Super Dress up

Sometimes life is wonderful.  This is one of those moments.

So stinking cute these two!

Super Hero Brothers to the rescue!

My life is wonderful.

UPWARD

The past three months Ali and Shadrach have been playing Upward Basketball.  I have loved the program.  It is run through several different churches in the area.  During their practice, they have a 15 min. devotional where they apply character traits like being Christlike, responsibility, and honesty to life situations and basketball situations.

Shadrach loved every min. of it.  However, after three months he still never got the ball to even touch the rim.  That didn't bother him at all though.  He focused on what a good defender he was and enjoyed the success of his team.

 

 

Ali on the other hand seem to have a talent for it.  This was her first time doing any kind of sport.  She learned how to make baskets right away.  She scored almost every game and some times scored as many as 8 points.  So we will have to see what happens with her basketball skills.

We are glad both of them enjoy basketball.  Even though we are not athletic, we see understanding sports as something essential in our culture.  So we will contiue sports but probably not like most parents do.  We are doing it more for the educational benifits of understand American culture than actually wanting our children to play in college or something like that.

Magic Tree House

I am a daughter of a Librarian which means I don't really buy books.  I borrow them.  Greg comes from a family were they buy tons of books all of the time.  It has been fun to mix the two different traditions. 

Both Ali and Shadrach love the Magic Tree House series.  Ali can read a book rather quickly in one day and it takes Shadrach a few days to finish one.  It makes me so happy to hear them talking to each other about a book they both have read.

I have had some trouble going to the library because Liam runs a muck while we are there.  So Greg fixed the problem.  He bought around 50 magic tree house books on ebay.  These are pictures of the day they came.  Shadrach was so excited.  He set them out on the table in order.  We also bought some Box Car Children books and have high hopes for those books as well.  I am hoping this summer to introduce them to Harry Potter but I am not sure if they are ready.  We might have to wait one more year.  I really want them to enjoy Harry Potter so I am not going to let them read them until I know they can understand everything.

Here's to reading a good book.

temper temper

We have an almost 2 year old that needs to go to anger management.  BOY!  I remember after I had two kids and thought I knew everything.  I am so sorry for every judgement thought I have ever had about any one with wild or unruly children.  Liam has made me very, very humble.  First, were does all that energy come from?  And second, why does that energy need to destroy things?

 He just has a motor on him that doesn't stop.  HE NEVER STOPS.  I strap him in his high chair every few hours just so I can have a break.  I give him toys to play with at the table, and he has fun playing there too.  HOWEVER, if he wasn't strapped in he would just continue to GO.

 He can become VERY ANGRY VERY EASILY.  and when I say angry I mean, screaming, hitting (himself mostly) and refusing to be near anyone for 2 hours.  Do you know what screaming at the top of your lungs is like for 2 hours?  It really wears you out ( and when I say you I mean me). 

I can't really go out in public any more because he is so uncontrolable.  I never go to the store with him.  And forget the Library.  That has been the saddest part.  We have so few new books to read.  I started taking him to several indoor play grounds because if he get out of control there I can easily just leave and there are already loud kids there.  -Sigh-  I finally felt like maybe we were out of this stage and then he flipped out at a friends house and screamed there for an hour because I told him "No" when he threw his banana on the floor.  The next day though he was very sick.  So I am hoping that maybe he wasn't feeling well and that had something to do with it. 

Enoch at home

Enoch is a delight to have at home while the older two are at school.  We have so much fun together.  He still has his cranky days but they are getting fewer and fewer, and I have FINALLY found ways to get him out of his funk.  Maybe I will write about those another day.

 I love Enoch's preschool, but I don't think they do nearly enough so I always supplement.  He often doesn't want to do things at first, but as soon as you get him going he enjoys himself for hours.

 Right now hand writing is still very hard.  All of my kids struggle with writing but the boys have even more trouble.  We still do a hand writing page a day though.

 I just started having Enoch read to me about a month ago.  I can't believe how quick he has caught on to it.  I probably should have started earlier then now, but I felt like I did try not to long ago and he wasn't really picking it up ( however that might have been summer time- i can't seem to remember). 

 

 He now knows 33 sight words and is pretty good at sounding words out when they are CVC words.  His emotions still get in the way of some learning time but I feel like we are making great strides. 

 

He needs lots and lots ( and lots) of love.  He needs you to hug and kiss and touch and hug and kiss and touch and hug and tell him you love him and think he is wonderful all of the time.  I don't mind doing it at all, but sometimes I just get going to fast and forget. 

I can't believe that next year he will be in Kindergarten.

pinewood derby/ tiger scouts

Shadrach won his Tiger race in the Pinewood Derby!  He was soo proud and so excited.  I missed the race because I was at Ali Basketball game. :(  But I got there in time for the award ceremony. 

He was so excited that he got a trophy.  I have a big moral issue with trophy/medals.  I think you should have to actually work hard to get one.  I don't like it when everyone gets a trophy.  That is not how life is.  Sometimes you work hard, and you still don't get the trophy which is an experience I hope Shadrach gets to have as well.  However I think Shad probably put over 16 hours into making his car, and I don't think some of the other boys did that so I guess the trophy is ok. :)

His first 2 cars broke while Greg and him tried to cut it with the saw. Then he had to sand the body of the car before painting.  I think he sanded it every day for a week and a half.  Then he painted it.  The hardest part was sanding the axles and the wheels.  We did this for about two hours one day.  I think that was the big part that helped him win.  So in April, he gets to race it again in a bigger setting.  I don't expect him to do well.  This was our very first Pinewood derby, so we didn't know exactly what to do.  I am sure several other tiger scouts have older brothers who know more. 

Laura Ingalls Wilder

Ali is doing a project at school about Laura Ingalls Wilder.  She has loved it.  She started reading the books herself this last summer while on vacation.    She was excited to do research about her and then she got to dress up like her for her school's Wax Museum.

Then there was a snow delay and it was cancelled.  She was devastated.  She cried and cried.  But it got rescheduled for the next Friday. 

 

100 years old

Shadrach had to dress up like he was 100 years old today for school because it was the 100th day of school.  He had a good time.  He really wanted a beard more than anything so I got some make up out and painted a beard on him.  I love that guy!

Scientist

 

 Shadrach got a telescope for Christmas.  He also got a microscope, binoculars, magnifying glass, and night vision goggles.  I guess he really like to look at things up close and in the dark.  It took me awhile to figure out how to work it.  I have a lot of experience with microscopes, but I have never adjusted I telescope myself.  It was fun.  So far we have only looked at the moon.  BUT the moon was/is cool.  It was a really good time.

 

 Shadrach is dead set on being a scientist and right now doesn't even entertain other ideas at all.  When we first moved here to Ohio, they had several different activities that you could be in.  I saw that one was Mad Science and put him in it.  I could have put him into the Lego Club or Computer Club almost as easily.  This one sounded more educational, so I picked it.  I thought he would make some new friends and at the same time maybe learn something.  Little did I know it would spark something inside of him.  Now it is science every day, all day long.    That was almost a year ago.

Rice bowl

 Shadrach's basketball team is raising money for hunger. Everyone on his team was given a rice bowl, and they were supposed to put money in it.  He immediately came home and put all of his money in it from his piggy bank and then put his tooth fairy money in it from just the night before.  I wanted to say to him, "Oh no, Shad.  You should put some in the rice bowl but you need to keep most of it."  or "Let's figure out 10% and you can put that into the rice bowl.  You worked hard for that money and it is yours."   ...... But I didn't.  I caught myself before the words came out of my mouth.  Instead, I felt the moment.  I hugged him.  I told him that he surprised me, and I was proud of him.  I told him I thought that Jesus would have done the same thing. I told him that he was being very charitable. The rest of the day he did chores so he could add more money in the rice bowl.  Shadrach made me think the rest of the day of what we should all be doing to be more charitable.